How to Spot a Democrat and a Republican

This one is fun, worth a laugh or two. God knows there is not much of that in politics these days. But at BarTalk on these pages, we’re always up for a good one. This comes by way of Ted McLaughlin, an unsung progressive blogger at jobsanger. Ted is a friend and former colleague with a keen eye on the American political scene. Here goes.

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, “Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am.”

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, “You’re in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.

“She rolled her eyes and said, “You must be an Obama Democrat.”

“I am,” replied the man. “How did you know?”

“Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I’m still lost. Frankly, you’ve not been much help to me.”

The man smiled and responded, “You must be a Republican.”

“I am,” replied the balloonist. “How did you know?”

“Well,” said the man, “you don’t know where you are or where you are going. You’ve risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You’re in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow, now it’s my fault.”

Editor’s Note: Tomorrow, November 5, 2013, is an “off-year” election in many states in the United States. A lot of state-wide and local elections are being contested. Turn out for these elections is appallingly low with more than half of eligible voters not bothering to vote. The do get bothered later when the politicians who they didn’t vote for get under their skin. Their only option then is to wait until the next election that they are likely to sit out as well. I don’t get it. The right to vote is in jeopardy in the United States and an informed and active electorate is the only check we “the people” have against the ruling class. So as the boss wards in days gone by would say: vote early and vote often. Slainte.


About Author

Josh is an author, former blogger, media critic, x-Capitol Hill legislative aide and White House assistant, business consultant, idea marketing specialist, a squatter at the global village virtual bar and an alpine rock gardener where he lives in Woodstock, NY.